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Rub The Bottle
Chapter One: In Which I Find Something That Definitely Wasn't a Message in a Bottle
The sky was putting on its best show just before sunrise — soft pinks and golds bleeding into the blue like someone had spilled a paint set and decided to call it art. My private stretch of beach was completely empty, the waves doing their slow, soothing dance against the sand. I had a towel, a cooler with fresh coconut water and sliced mango, and absolutely nowhere else to be.
Perfect.
I'd bought...
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Jimmy Chilla For President
A Reading Guide
Bold text means we are being completely serious.
Italic...
The UNCs
The Ones Who Never Stopped
I. Executive Summary
You've seen us.
We stand near the back of...
A Position Paper on the Aesthetic, Historical, and Cultural Case Against Tattoos
I. Abstract
This paper presents a comprehensive position against the modern tattoo trend,...
Now Casting: Gorgeous 18-24 Year Old Natural Beauties Wanted!
Hey there, beautiful! Are you a fresh, confident, naturally stunning young woman between 18 and...
The Myth of the Ugly Rich Man
I. The Night the Myth Fell Away
A belief floated around for years: most rich men are ugly. Not...